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Peace to all men. Even the women, as much as you don't deserve it. @Canuck I'm sorry for banning you. I promise I won't do it again. I had too much khat in me. A question for you, do you still have access to the threads on Somaliane. The website is down. I'd like to collect my threads on there...

Am I the only one who's impressed by the inflation of Nancy Pelosi's chest? For a woman her age, she's packing some mean caano giving organs. No sag either. As a student of economics, inflation's never looked so good. The Ilhan thing got me paying more attention to Nancy's assets. She's got...

Alhamdulillahi wassalatu wassalamu ala rasoolillah, amma ba'd I've been impressed by the level of intelligence I've seen on this site. I thought you guys were hopeless. But every day I see encouraging signs of clever and smart kids who've not been mentally raped by Saudi camel fuckers. Plenty...

My dad thinks this is haram because it is Western But he thinks this is halal because it is Arab culture Cigarettes are from the kuffar a xalimo told me, you will go to hell akhi, but "Allah's down for the aromatic pipe"

I'm thinking of releasing an album of nasheeds like the great Ani Zonneveld. Sufi music, ahh such a blessing. Although one or two might be obscenity laced anti-Saudi rap songs, part Somali, part English, part classical Arabic. Would you guys buy it or do you only buy tickets for soulless Drake...

Warya means tranny in Indonesian. I was talking to my friend Abdulqadir after salatul Fajr in the masjid. I said "warya pass Sahih Bukhari". A guy from Jakarta overheard me and thought I was calling Abdul a shemale. He looks effeminate now that I think about it. Look it up in Indonesian...

I put on my khamees and grabbed my tusbax today. A miswaak was dangling from my yellow tobacco stained teeth. It's jumucah. Allahu Akbar. The day of cibaadah. I sprayed on my Calvin Klein perfume, $59.99, and blocked all the zina loving Hawiye sisters from work on my phone. I rocked up to the...

I convinced a Twitter feminist to be pro-life right after I told her why we need the death penalty. Save a life and take a life on the same day - everyday is an adventure. Inspired by @zuzu.

@Huuno Hunter. He was a cool dude. We used to kick it together on the forum run by that retarded gay Somali which will not be named. Anybody have news on his whereabouts? Or is he hiding under a new cabaaya?

Rabbiyow na cafi

Why are you telling me to kill myself macaan? That is very rude. It hurts my feelings. And why do you keep insulting respected Somalis like Jamal Osman and Nimco Ali? That's not good for the community. We have to support them. And why do you lie about me? Allah will punish you for what you...

Shia girls: Salafi girls: You decide.

I don't think she loves me. She hangs framed portraits of my younger brothers on the wall, but none of me. She's always calling them, but I have to call her. She always boasts to her friends about their careers in accounting and software development. But no word about all the years I spent...

My name is Arooska & im the biggest Twerp here.

I was talking to my friend Ibrahim today at the masjid about this. Hadiths say that the Kaaba will be destroyed by an Ethiopian in the End Times. If Ethiopians can destroy the Kaaba, what hope does Somalia have? Let's face it, we're screwed. They will **** us forever. The worst part is that the...

Is it really true that the great lion of the Lane, Mr @White, has had a sex change op and become the nutty blue haired feminist @Batuulo? I heard it from two users, one reliable, one not so reliable. What happened to White? Why did he become such a mangina? Huge disappointment. I had high...

Great name saxib. I thought I had a cool name, but you have both cocaine and Malyun in yours, two things which go together perfectly. Tell us more about yourself. Are you a secular mujahid like Mama Malyun? Have you converted to the Jesus manhaj too? Is cocaine the only substance that you...

Monisha Hersey Jaded Young Libax Trumpets Jacqueline Rivera Paris Hassan Evi? What happened to the girls? A Somali forum with no FGM cases is no forum at all. We've got @Lola of all people, but not the regulars? Doesn't make no sense. Who else are we missing? List the fallen heroes here.

I used to say about internet wars, "Relax it's just words on a screen". And now one of the Mods has this as her signature without any credit. Wallahi I'm sick of this! I have been plagiarized so many times in my life. Plagiarized on Somnet. Plagiarized on SSpot. Plagiarized on the Lane. Even...

Would you make a pact with someone here that you will marry them? Some of us have been chatting and flirting on these forums way longer than boys and girls do back home to the people they end up getting hitched to. That's enough time to get to know someone. Girls, what do you say, wanna...